Friday, December 05, 2008
Thursday, December 04, 2008
With sweet and buggy breath, it bellowed out, across the Jordan, Prepare Him a way!
Make His paths straight!
The head of John the Baptist bent low when he baptized the Lamb.
The sight of his Lord and the sound of God’s voice put a thought in John’s head.
He must increase. I must decrease.
The head of John the Baptist pressed hard against the wall of his cell.
Disconnected from the body of his followers, a sense of doubt grew in his mind.
Was his cousin really the One?
The head of John the Baptist hung from a saddle, bouncing inside a wet sack.
Up the Jordan a hundred miles, from prison to palace – first time in Galilee.
Then it went to a girl on a platter.
The head of John the Baptist was an outrage all over Israel.
The people’s disfavor made their leaders slow to repeat that same crime.
For a time, Christ was safe in Judea!
John’s head, once again, had prepared the Lord’s way.
--Posted By Bill to Bible/History Blog at 12/01/2008 12:05:00 AM
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Sweet smiling faces with sparkly brown eyes and shiny black braids.
A new phone.
Warm bed/ cold morning.
Tacos. (I can't link you to the Texaco station where they are the BEST EVER. Sorry.)
Grasping at Spanish.
High School Musical 3.
Knitting with red yarn.
Candles with holiday scents.
Kneading bread by hand.
Emma going by "Emily" at school, but not at home.
Saying goodbye to apartment life.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Why haven't I blogged? Well, besides the general lack of anything unique in my life to report, my internet is down. Down dooby-do down down. Has been for some time. And those cable guys can only come out during work hours. Boo.
I don't get on Bill's lappy to blog because then he sits next to me and makes comments when I do like: "DON'T blog about how you got nothing to blog! Just don't blog if you don't have anything to say!!!" At which point I shoot him a look, and quote him. Which may or may not be entertaining.
I sat down to make a card the other day, and it feels like papercrafting has gone totally stale for me. Who knows? Maybe the holidays will bring it back. Baking, however, is still a whole other story. Last week it was french bread and the first attempt to make copy cat "Krumballs" which is cake rolled up in a ball and dipped in chocolate like a truffle. Yes, they are so good. Yes, they such a pain to make.
Knitting also, is a fun sport. But the event in which I excel this season is sleeping. I'm super good at going to bed early and struggling to drag myself out in the mornings.
And now the newsworthy part: Emma is two chapters away from finishing her first Magic Treehouse book, which are her first chapter books. I am so excited about this! So is she, which is really, really cool.
So glad that fall and the holidays have arrived! It's my favorite time of year.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Sunday, September 14, 2008
I know I do!
I got my scanner working , but still am missing a cord for the printer...not that it will make it work, but maybe the good rest will have helped.
So I edited some photos with plans to post them, and every single time I hit the browse button on blogger or flickr, NOTHING HAPPENS.
I feel I have reached my quota for trouble shooting tonight, so I'm just putting my hope in the restart button.
Went to the park twice today. The weather (which was supposed to be jacked up from Ike) was just gorgeous. Blue sky, warm sun, cool breeze. So refreshing-so lifting. I am totally stoked that fall is on the move in my direction. I feel creative, introspective and energized when the weather cools down.
I also start to bake.
Lord have mercy.
Monday, September 01, 2008
But there are things affecting me lately that I would like to put out there.
a) Her blog posts of returning. Wish I could say I am consistent or dogged in my pursuit, but I'm there with her to a degree. Helping me along are Frank Laubach and Brother Lawrence.
b) I had the huge privilege of hearing Paul Young (author of The Shack) speak this week. I could really go on and on and on about how refreshing it was, and how he spoke of a loving, gracious, living, real Lord from an obviously real relationship with Him, and how delightful it was to just sit and absorb and receive and let Hope blossom inside.
c) Got to see Neil this week, and hold in our hands his BOOK!!! It's called Christ in Ya'll and I will give copies to the first two people to comment and say they want one! I started tearing up reading the first chapter. (Plus, my darling daughter is pictured on the cover! :) ) Its about Christ and Community, and Bill and I were talking about how unique it is in that it features a present, ongoing, real experience and not just theory.
d) Eczema. Like crazy. On both hands. This is the worst case I've had in my life. (and I've had alot!) It's been going on for five weeks now, and nothing seems to help. It's grody, and it totally interferes with my quality of life. Even typing, I feel the cracking burning itch with every keystroke. But, the show must go on. I welcome any suggestions anyone has for ending this madness. Ug.
e) Every morning when I step out of the shower and start putting lotion on my face, I find myself singing "Here she co-uh-uh-uh-uh-mes....that's Kathy's clown." Do you know this song? Why do I sing it? This was puzzling me for days and days. That is until about two days ago, when I caught myself transitioning into it from the song "You got to have frie-eh-eh-eh-ends!" I continued thinking backwards and realized that I have been thinking about friends and friendship every morning in the shower for at least two weeks. What thoughts particularly, I'm uncertain, but the topic apparently arises daily. Now, call me crazy, but I think that means that it's important to me. He blogged about it, and I think it's worth reading.
f) Tennis. Bo and I try to play as much as possible. I just finished a four week class, and Bo is just starting his second 4 week class. It is just super fun, but I can't seem to be good at it quickly enough.
g) I am grateful. Grateful for where I've been, where I am, and what is in store. Grateful to the Lord for His presence in every moment, His unfailing love and kindness towards me, and His desire for me to know Him.
h) Hearing a language for most of the day that is different from the only language you speak is exhausting. I need to remedy that.
These things are not necessarily listed in order of importance. And I'm basically just touching on them- some of them really deserve their own posts, namely a, b, c and e. Probably I should have just skipped d altogether, but hey, it's a thing right now.
Here's to a good week.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
The backpacks are stuffed with fresh school supplies.
The lunches are made.
The singing and reading is over, and now they sleep.
I will be grateful for this one of few mornings when they jump out of bed.
First day, field trips, last day.
All the others require a little shaking, bright lights, much prodding.
But tommorrow, they will be scrubbed and at the door, pressing me to go.
Ah, me. Time.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
I can barely bring myself to even check my gmail because it is generally so boring.
Why is that?
Other than the fact that YOU are not filling up my inbox with newsy epistles, I have no new websites that interest me. Other than the pioneer woman.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
I have another day to work registration, which is an onslaught of strangers speaking in a foreign language. Literally. And I have no translator today. I know I can do it, I know I can. I'll just keep smiling. And say the words I know.
My darling daughter has just appeared out of the darkness of the hallway and kitchen with her quiet walk, and appeared next to me, fuzzy headed and warm skinned from bed, a stuffed animal under each arm, to inform me that she can't sleep. "Oh!" I say "Well, good news. It's morning."
Then her delightful chuckle and toothless smile is my reward.
She wants to know if we lived in the country, would a rooster wake us up this early.
This day is going to be alright.
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
Monday, August 04, 2008
I'm having a hard time not just swallowing this in one gulp. As it is I'm 2/3s of the way through it in 2 days (so far.) I hate, hate, hate finishing a series I love. Bill bought me my "vampire romance" book just after the midnight release. I'm a fan....of him...and this series...and I'm not ashamed of it. :)
Monday, July 21, 2008
Here are some pictures of my gorgeous family at our gorgeous family reunion in Destin this year. It only happens every three years. What a wonderful, wonderful week.
You want to know the key to a successful family reunion?
Sunday, July 06, 2008
So other than fevers of 104 each morning, we are settling in. Most of the boxes are dispensed with...and the ones that are left are those horrid ones full of mismatched items that don't really go anywhere, but cannot be got rid of. Other than that, it's all good.
Found my sewing machine in the unpacking process. Made three pages yesterday. I mean, woah. Plus, my sister is really motivating. This is how she motivates.
Jenny: "Uhhhh, Darling Sister o' Mine?"
Me: "Ye-e-es. Of course I'll foil your hair."
Jenny: "Ok great thanks, but that's not what I was going to ask."
Me: "Ok. What?"
Jenny: "My artist for the month is not ready. Do you think you have enough things or could come up with some things to put on the wall at the coffee shop?"
Me: "Not seriously. Jen. It's scrapbooking. NO ONE wants to look at those pages."
Jenny: "Yes they do. And I really need something."
Me: "hem and haw and deflect and argue"
Jenny: "Well, just let me know."
At a prolific period in my life I would have squealed for joy, but in the last few months with the move and whatnot, art has not even come up on my radar. Ok, I thought about it few times but in terms such as "futile" or "tiresome" or even "something I used to do." So it was one of those timing things. In a bad way, I thought. Until I found that sewing machine. Crazy isn't it, what kind of things come together to motivate creativity again?
Oh. I forgot to tell you another way she inspires. She commisioned one of these for me. Heck, even I'm jealous of me!
Sunday, June 29, 2008
We are now in an apartment in Texas, settling in.
For a huge transition it went quite smoothly. We had a wonderful visit in Baton Rouge with Bill's side of the family. The kids behaved so well on the 10 hour and again on the 8 hour car rides. They never complained. Since Bill was driving the truck and I was in the car with them, I was especially grateful. Special thanks is also due to Cracker Barrel's Audio Book Rental Program. The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane got us through Mississippi and Alabama, and Once Upon a Marigold carried us through Louisiana and Texas. (I'd link about three things in that last sentence, but my computer is running as slow as christmas. Apparently it took the move pretty hard.)
I cried all the way to Lake City, when Bo and Em encouraged me to "think about something else" which, to my relief, actually worked. It is hard to drive through your tears.
I'm ready to get my crafty area set up. It feels like forever since I've done anything creative, and I want to move in new directions. Not sure what those directions are.
Back to emptying boxes!
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Monday, June 16, 2008
The Goodwill is a great storage unit.
Banker's Boxes are totally worth the investment (some of ours are on their 4th move!)
Carefully marking your boxes is highly overrated.
Packing can be done relatively quickly if you get rid of a lot of stuff.
Fewer stuff= Fewer boxes. That's my kind of math!
The newest helpful moving tool we have found are the vacuum bags from IKEA. They are actually called Hajdeby, which translated means: "Miracles of the Modern Age as Interpreted by Brilliant Swedish Designers." I call them "sucky bags."
Here we have the before shot of a number of our family's animal friends. Notice how fluffy and three dimentional they are? Those things have taken up a lot of truck space in the past! What will we do now that we only have a 17ft truck? Leave them behind? May it never be!
Enter the miraculous Hajdeby. This bag was made to hold two pillows and one blanket, but look how well 3,487,598 stuffed animals fit inside! And look how happy it has made the kids to see their animals so compacted. Because, really, isn't their happiness what it's all about?
Thursday, June 12, 2008
That is, the living of a good and somewhat deranged life, if you are my offspring.
High Five if you know what the title of this post is a quote from.
Sunday, June 08, 2008
In the last ten years my relationship with Him has been intensely and happily corporate. I believe that God wants a people, a group, His children to know Him together. I have found Christ richly and deeply with others.
Now I am alone.
Before you slant your head to the side and say "awww," please realize what "alone" means for me. It means I have a husband who is pretty much on the same page as I am, spiritually (although our methods and approach differ.) I have adorable children who ask questions like "Mama, I just noticed something in my Manga Bible. God made light before he made the sun. How is that possible? And who made God?" and then (after I practically swallow my tongue and twitch in anxiety until I remember John 1) when I direct him to this, he goes "Oh, well that explains everything!" I have a believing family, extended family and friends.
What I had was more intentional than that. Ideally, our purpose was the Lord and His Church. It is why we gathered. To give Him something. It was why I gathered, anyway. I could say alot about that. I believe it. I miss it. It was, at best, the deepest I'd ever seen the Lord, and at worst, well, just all the bad things that come along with being part of a group with an absent (on purpose) leader, and an different opinion/personality for each person.
When I was a teenager I read a quote from Tennyson on the back of a Celestial Seasonings box about "Life piled on life" and I wanted that. You know what? I had it. Not "good piled on good" or "good piled on bad" or "good piled on life"(although if anyone finds that version, I would not be opposed to partaking of it) I wanted Life. Living. To experience the most that could be experienced out of every day. I experienced a lot of the Lord in the garbage of daily life. What more could I ask for?
But in all this corporate pursuit of the Lord, there was a letting go of my personal relationship to Him. I was always aware of this, and I know others were, because we would talk about it. But I would just let it go- thinking that it was all tied in to this higher thing of knowing the Lord together.
So here we are, the point of all this. I am alone in my pursuit of Him. I do not have people I can rely on to drag me back to Him on at least a weekly basis. I have tried going to regular old church and I can't stomach it, and don't invite me to yours unless you are prepared to handle a scene because I will probably start weeping uncontrollably. I can corral it into looking like "repentance" for the sake of appearances, but believe me when I tell you that it ain't.
The idea of "personal relationship" to the Lord became a lesser thing to me. This is no one's fault but my own. It was something I was shocked to discover in November when I realized that "personal relationship" was what it had all been reduced to. For a while there, I didn't believe it. How could a God, Who is corporate, put any stock in my individual love for Him? There's no adding, no expanding, just simple ol' tired-out doubting me. A dear sister told me "How can he not care about you personally? Think how much I care about you, and how much bigger His love is?" It's true, and yet...(shoulder shrug) ok, great. Whatever, man.
Truthfully, I don't think I was sure how to face him without an army of saints at my back. How to come to him empty handed, needy (shiver), banal, and above all else, solitary? And if indeed I did manage to connect, how could it do anything other than fall short of the glory I had known in the past, and simply serve to wake a thirst that couldn't be slaked?
Months went by, and I didn't do anything. I didn't talk to Him, didn't think of Him. And things were ok. Life was good. Not rich, but good. I've been in dry places before...I know there is an end to them. I don't panic anymore when they come, I usually just ride them out.
I can't say what it was exactly that brought me to the place where I wasn't afraid to "make eye contact" with Jesus anymore. Perhaps just time to let the wrench from the change settle and fade.
I decided I needed a "new" relationship to my Lord. One that fits my "alone" status. One that is, forgive me, mine. Not casting aside anything I've known or learned of Him, but letting it support TODAY's revelation of who He is and not determining it.
So far, I've discovered something major.
He cares about me.
My brain and soul start to splinter admitting that. It sounds so
a) basic, duh!
b) self centered and shallow.
But here's the thing. His caring for me is not the end of my story, nor the totality of my "new" relationship with Him. It's only a beginning. It may be a slow growth, but I'm not eager to rush into the deeper things, quite honestly. I'm savoring this knowledge.
Thank you Lord. You are sufficient for today.
Monday, June 02, 2008
Emotionally, I cannot deny that I am glad to go home.
But I cannot deny that it is hard to leave.
I hate leaving. I'm tired of saying goodbye.
2.5 days of school left.
18 days until we load the truck
23 days until we arrive in Texas
I don't want to live by countdowns, but I'm afraid old habits die hard.
In less melancholy tones:
David graduated! Have I mentioned that not only Dave, but Luke and Mark also got full scholarships? We're very proud!
This is the second incarnation of my haircut. Needs to be shorter in the back, imho.
Hellooooo fatty. Get some sleep, yo. See next picture.
We're into green smoothies these days....this one not looking so green, but spinach gets squashed with all that, er, heavy watermelon right, on the top, there.
Doncha love the big pink bow? And the sideways pupils?
I got a job as a school nurse at an elementary school in Texas and I'm beyond thrilled about that. We've had a struggle this year, but living near Missy, Scott and kids, making dear friends, and gaining experience- has made it very worthwhile.
We don't regret coming at all.
And (cover your eyes Floridians)
as Emma said:
"We really are more Texas people than Florida people."
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Friday, May 09, 2008
And I, finding it, am astounded by the grace of God. By seasons of Him. By the grace of being able to remember.
I've been looking for faith. Looking for hope, and finding nothing. Seriously, HOW many times do I have to go through this in my life before I no longer search in futility and just go straight to Him? Maybe it's because half the time I don't recognize that I'm looking for something to satisfy me.
He is faith.
He is hope.
He satisfies my hunger and thirst.
He is all.
Let all those other chips fall where they may.
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
She isn't usually very chatty. It's hard to get a word in edgewise with this one in constant attendance, but when we are alone, she hits a train of thought, and plows through it, full speed ahead. Her progression of thought is very logical, quite mature. She just has a hard time spitting it out. Literally. One time I counted how many times she repeated"Um..Mama...one time..." before she actually told me the thing she wanted to tell me.
We are working on thinking through the whole sentence in her head and THEN saying it. She could not say her R's for a long time and we would try and try to correct her to no avail. Then one day she heard herself on a video. She looked at me and said "Why do I sound so weiwd?" I said "It's because you say weiwd not weird. Hear the difference?" She was silent for a while thinking about it, and then began correcting herself.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
I think its the first one.
Anyhow. It's apt. I never actually defined that one for myself. I know there's a dictionary definition, but some words are REAL only when you make your own definition. Plus, you don't have to go to the fuss and bother of looking them up, and/or using them in correct context.
I am doing my dadgum ding dong darndest to live in the present. It's not like there isn't stuff to do and enjoy! (there's plenty of stuff to do and NOT enjoy, but that's beside the point.)
There are some problems with this, however.
One problem is that stuff in the future tends to seem so much more consequential than things in the present. Another problem is that time goes by SO FAST. I swear, it was yesterday, like, 10 minutes ago. Case in point. Darling baby nephew Zach is 17 today. That is ridiculous.
When I try to embrace the present, I start to go a little crazy. When I get a minute (forgive me, moment) to reflect, I start counting. Trust me, when I start doing Math, it's a sure sign that screws are loosening.
For example. Zach is 17. I was 17 16 years ago. Bo was born half of that time ago, and in that same time (8 years) I will be 41 and Bo will be 16. (Lord, help us all.) Emma will be 14 which is the age I was when David was born. David is graduating from High School next month. (and has a full basketball scholarship, btw!!! GO DAVE!!!!) When I graduated from High School it was 1993 and I bought my first CD which was the En Vogue single "Free Your Mind." The divas of En Vogue are probably the grandmas of Beyonce and Rhianna and Ciara. Which means that time is moving unaccountably fast and I can pretty much guarantee that I just lost track of it.
By the time I have thought all these things, and done all that horrible adding and subtracting etc..I'm totally exhausted and have to go play a game of pyramid solitare just to recover. It turns out that reflecting is not restorative in many cases for me.
But pyramid solitare?
That's zen, man.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
b) stop more places (we only did a three day with one destination. I think two would've been better, but five days seems like a long time)
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
One bad thing about being a nurse is that you still get sick. Then a good thing is that you get better. Then a bad thing is that your daughter gets sick.
One good thing about being a nurse is participating in this, and having teachers join you in support of the kids. Very cool.
I'm getting my scrapbooks organized and accomplished what Emma (bless her poor feverish little body) called "a little bit of re-doing." I took about 15 minutes to move some pictures around on the bookshelf that is our living room and dust it. Then I laid down for 2 hours.
I am re-re-re-reading a book that Susie gave me not long after Bill and I were married. It is my go to book for comfort and is a re-set button when I feel unsatisfied with my home and the life I live inside it. Unlike most design books, it makes me appreciate what I have. Love this book, and recommend it to anyone.
Monday, March 17, 2008
I got to really looking at this picture. Look at that crazy kindergarten classroom! Color, words, stimuli everywhere. Kindergarten classrooms are usually just bulging with crafts, toys, books, posters, learning galore! It's all low to the ground and accessible. There are little chairs with pockets in the back, buckets of crayons, glue and scissors on little tables, and art displayed all over the place.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that a well designed kindergarten classroom doesn't necessarily reflect a theme, or even look that pretty at first glance. It serves a purpose. It is useful and stimulating. A well run kindergarten is truly a sight to behold.
I think these are themes to borrow for my home. I don't have space. I don't have money. I have stuff. Stuff like pictures still leaning against the wall. Bookshelves that have empty spaces and stuff piling up around them. Baskets with contents unexplored for months. Time to re-think. Time to clean out and move around. (The re-thinking, cleaning out and moving around I don't have a problem with. It's the TIME.)
I'm ready for more color in my days.
I'm ready for the useful, the necessary, to be stimulating and interesting.
I'm ready to finish what I start. I think. I hope.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
b) posted with that title!
But since Linda tagged me, I shall come out of my blog slump and post.
Seven random facts about me.
Which may turn into seven random things I thought about today, but that's still about me, right?
I finally am eating something besides a meat and cheese sandwhich, diet cherry vanilla dr. pepper and 100 cal snack bag for lunch. That is what I have eaten all year, with only slight variation, and the occasional splurge for "Grease Friday" when we order lunch out. This week I have had a lean pocket, a propel and a 100 cal snack bag. That's high livin' right there.
I have been diet coke free for 9 days. I have also been relatively headache free for 9 days.
Except for last friday night when I worked as a server and had a diet caffeine free coke to sustain me.
Speaking of which, having donned the tux shirt, bowtie and vest for the event, I now have complete sympathy for all the grooms in the world. Sheesh.
I remembered something. I remembered that my mother told me it was probably time for Bo to move to a sippy cup because he was throwing his bottle in the sink when he was finished with it. Before you gasp at how old he was, he was not yet two. So there. Train 'em early, I always say.
I really could eat candy morning noon and night. I love candy. dang it dang it dang it.
I am very strict with my children. My philosophy is that I'm raising them to be responsible, flexible, well-rounded adults. Lord help me, it's hard. They are so funny!
K. that's seven. Not very interesting really, but there you are.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
But, now--now all is changed.
A rebound, foul or aforementioned "over the back" call has the power to either
a) thrill me to my very core
b) send me into the depths of despair.
In the last two weeks I have been at two seperate approximately 1.4 hour events in which I feel that I have lived and died a few times, gathering new grey hairs every minute. I've tried not to care, honestly I have, but I'm apparently either not that kind of person, or WAY to invested in my eblings. In this case, probably both.
I say this, because of the strange phenomenon that is occuring in my life. People don't seem to care that Orange Park High School is now in the 6A quarter finals in boys basketball.
(pause for all my devoted blog readers who are having their own little celebrations with their computer screens, cause I know both of you are and I bless you for it)
I mean, come ON. If we win this game on Saturday, we go to state! This is monumental, earth shattering news! I expect people to whip out the pom poms and do a hurkey when I tell them this. Instead they say "In what sport? Basketball? Oh, that's good huh?"
Uh, YEAH. sheesh.
Just because LAST year I could have cared less. And did, actually. But that doesn't give all you other people an excuse. I FORGIVE you, but implore you to get on the bandwagon and live the full high school basketball fan life that I am living.